Wierd Christmas Toys and Other Stuff

Howdy from Mouskin, Texas!

Mom went out and got some bumper sticker paper for the printer today, so I'll be finally getting the contest done soon. Since it has been so long, if anyone else wants to send one in, or you want to remind me of what you DID send in (because there's a slim possibility that I have misPLACED it), please do.

Well, mom has been free associating again, and has come up with some really interesting toy ideas that you probably don't want to give to your kids for Christmas.

1) The Drama Queen Cell Phone- This cute cell phone is toddler-sized but has all the same features as mommy's phone. Children can answer various ring tones, including "Baby's Got Back", "I'm Too Sexy", and "Rehab" . Your child will be able to mute, hold, and conference call with her friends. The phone has fifteen fun phrases like, "I'm nah zoo trunk to drive, Ossifer!", "Paris! OHMYGOD! It's Paris!", "Have mommy call my lawyer" and "I think I'm pregnant again". The Drama Queen Phone comes in pink, black and glitter gold. Made in China. Ages 3 and up.

2) Baby Upchuck- Treat your boy or girl to all the joys of parenthood. Baby Upchuck has all the features of a real baby! Feed Baby Upchuck and watch him spit it up. Give him a drink and he chokes and vomits. Baby Upchuck's diapers really need changing!
This precious doll has a realistic cry with a four-hour timer and a sound sensing device. Guaranteed to deposit fluids when held upright. Comes with special food and water for diaper authenticity. Anatomically correct. Ages 5 and up. Special model for teenagers with built-in sex detector.

3) MCI Trauma Set- Let your little helper practice with the MCI Trauma Set. Comes with "Live Action" wreckers, firetrucks, ambulances, police cars, and damaged vehicles with real sirens, lights and screams of the injured. Forty-five exciting action figures include injured patients, paramedics and rubberneckers. Two crashable tractor-trailers and one church van included.
Hazmat module includes flammable tanker, hazmat team and six dead policeman.

4) Mr. VooDoo Head- By the makers of Mr. Potato Head, Mr. VooDoo Head is a doll with interchangeble parts. Is your teacher blonde? Big-nosed? Well, Mr. VooDoo head has it all. Is the school bully a red-headed dwarf? Depend on Mr. VooDoo Head. Comes with 24 pins and black candle. Personal items not included. Ages 8 and up.

OK, so I told you she was on the odd side. Well, that's about it for now. We'll be eating birdie on Thursday and going to Arlington on Friday, so I'll be catching you up from there. Mom and The Emily and KK and I will be going to the Bridal Shower for Morgan's Beth. Mom says it will be a long drive. Emily says it'll be a long drive because she'll be with mom. Kemper and I say, "Bring it on!!!"

Have a Happy Thanksgiving!

Perry